Tao-ist Sublimation - Lynn Osborn

Lynn OSBORN
Three Gems of Alchemical Initiation
Part 1: Powers of Transformation


One of ONE
What is the alchemical laboratory? What is alchemical spiritual development? The answer is that the alchemical laboratory can be any system that cooks up alchemical energy.
Alchemical spiritual development depends upon the consumption of useful power. The Taoist alchemists have given us the best revelations about useful power. This alchemical manna comes in three flavors in a paradox. Though the three flavors are different they are one and the same. And you cannot have one without the others.
The Taoist alchemists called these powers chi, ching and shen. Chi, we will call continuation power. Ching, we will call creation power. Shen, we will call manifestation power. One circulates Chi power; one sublimates Ching power; one distills Shen power. Lu K’uan Yu, Taoist alchemist (born 1898) said in, Taoist Yoga Alchemy and Immortality, "You should sublimate the three precious elements, namely the generative force [ching], (vital) breath [chi] and spirit [shen] to restore their original strength and the foundation will be laid when these three elements unite; only then can immortality be attained."
The concept of chi is more familiar to Western pilgrims than ching or shen. Ti Chi and the martial arts are based on physical exercises that enhance the circulation of chi in the practitioner's body. Every living being circulates chi power to continue existence. For humans breathing air into the physical body unconsciously and automatically circulates chi. Lu K’uan Yu said concerning Gathering the Microcosmic Outer Alchemical Agent, "The human body is like a rootless tree and relies solely on the breath as root and branches. The outer alchemical agent is produced by means of fresh air breathed in and out, laying the foundation (chu chi)."
You must become conscious of the circulating chi in order to develop spiritual power. When you are conscious of chi circulation you will become aware of your subtle body. You can apprehend the subtle body by sublimating ching or distilling shen. Everyone does these things unconsciously and automatically, but you must become conscious of the sublimations and distillations. This is much more difficult than becoming aware of circulating chi. So circulation of chi is the initial alchemical gemstone. Indeed, many people learned to circulate chi consciously through practices taught by various esoteric schools. Some Rosicrucian societies in the West and Hindu sects in the East have taught breathing exercises that consciously circulate chi. Alchemy refers to circulating chi as inner circulation.
By inner circulation I mean that system of movement existing in contrast and complement to the physical systems within the human organism. There are the circulatory system, nervous system, respiratory system and other biological systems that are studied by biology and medicine. These biophysical systems generate within their networks complex psychic systems that precipitate behavior which is studied by the social and behavioral sciences. The complex psychic systems congeal perceptions and sentiments that direct the movement of the organism as a whole be it fortuitous or disastrous.
Alchemically speaking the biophysical and psychic systems in the human organism have a subtle counterpart that is necessary for them to exist. That subtle counterpart is the inner circulation, and it is metamorphic just as the psychic system is a metamorphic condition generated by the biophysical system.
The Emerald Tablet is the prima materia of alchemical initiation. Imbedded within this brief gem is the process to initiate the inner circulation. The inner circulation is described in detail by the Taoist alchemists and to a lesser extent the Hindu alchemists. The Rosicrucians in the West also taught the separation of chi from the oxygen molecule in the breath of air in order to power the inner circulation (Rosicrucians never called It chi.).
I have been practicing the inner circulation for over twenty years. It is as safe and natural as walking and running. In fact practicing the inner circulation will stabilize energy imbalances of all kinds that may afflict the microcosm of the operator.
The Emerald Tablet is the oldest Western text yet found that contains the breathing exercises that can power the inner circulation with chi or Outer Microcosmic quintessence. The Smagdarine gem offers much more than an esoteric breathing exercise. It’s a transcendental map that expands as the energy of the inner circulation expands within the operator.
Emerald Tablet:
‘Tis true without falsehood, and most real: that which is above is like that which is below, to perpetrate the miracles of One thing.  And as all things have been derived from One, by the thought of One, so all things are born from One by adoption.
The Sun is Its father; the Moon is Its mother.  The Earth is Its nurse; the belly of the Wind carries It.  Here is the essence of every Perfection in the world.  Its strength and power prevail when turned into earth; thou wilt separate the earth from fire, the subtle from the gross, gently and with great care.
It ascends from earth to heaven, descends again to earth and receives the power of the higher and the lower.  By this means, thou wilt have the glory of the world.  And because of this, all obscurity will flee from thee.  Within this is the power, most powerful of all powers.  For It will overcome all subtle things, and penetrate every solid thing.  Thus the world was created.  Wonderful adaptations will emerge from this; It is the Way.
And for this reason, I am called Hermes Trismegistus, having the three parts of the philosophy of the world.  What I have said of the Sun’s operations is complete.
The first paragraph describes the unifying Principle in the universe. The ontology of One is listed to help focus the pilgrim on the way of transcendence. The second and third paragraphs tell you where It is and how to move It and what powered metamorphosis It will unleash when circulated.
"The Sun is It‘s Father; the Moon is It’s Mother," says It is born in the mysterium conjunctionis of the cosmic pair of opposites. "The Belly of the Wind Carries It," says It is in the air. "Thou wilt separate the earth from the fire, the subtle from the gross, gently and with great care." tells one to separate the subtle essence of It from the gross air. This is done gently and with great care, meaning no great force is needed --- just careful attention.
When It is separated from the air It naturally ascends and descends in sync with breathing in and out. One rotation completes a circuit the Taoist alchemists called the "microcosmic orbit". Rotating It through the inner circulation generates power needed to transcend limitations. Perception expands in scope as the operator practices the inner circulation once the floating Point at the center of the forehead in activated. To initiate the inner circulation first find a quiet tranquil place where one can be alone. Sit comfortably. Calm the internal noise. Use whatever meditative technique you’re familiar with or just sit quietly for a few moments.
The Inhalation: Place the tip of your tongue softly to the roof of your mouth. Inhale gently and steadily through the nose. "Imagize" a subtle force separating from the air you are breathing in. Breath in until the lungs are full. The gross air travels on down your throat into the lungs; pay no attention to it. Instead focus on the image of a subtle force energizing above the nose. "Imagize" It arcing from the forehead down to the base of the skull then down the spine as the breath is drawn in. Pressing the tongue to the roof of the mouth gives one a physical location, a kind of switch, that helps initiate the sense of separation needed to "pare" it from the air. Some people need a prayer or incantation to invoke during initiation praxis. The essence thus separated is very subtle in the early stages and too much attention and concentration upon It will cause It to dodge your attention and concentration like an impish sprite. At such times concentrating on the invocation while breathing solves the problem. Here is the prayer/incantation that I have used for years to steady the inhalation separation: say quietly to yourself, "Spirit descending upon the air ignite the fire of life; energize imagination, inspiration and vitality". It’s simple and exact in prosaic content parallel to the process you’re initiating.
The Exhalation: Move the tongue to the bottom of your mouth just below the front teeth. Exhale through your mouth slowly and steadily. Imagine the essence of It rising from the base of your genitalia upward through the viscera up the center of your chest. At the throat the energy forks below your tongue and then rises into the hemispheres of your brain. Exhale completely but don’t make yourself uncomfortable in so doing. Here again an exhalation prayer/invocation can be helpful to keep the circulation focused. Say quietly to yourself as you exhale, "Body rising through the earth fortify the water of life; manifest strength, determination, will power and health".
Practice this operation as long as you like, however about twenty minutes time is necessary to get an effective circulation going in the initial stages. The spirit descending is dry and cool; the body rising is warm and moist. You may feel It pulsing gently in the groin region at the end of the inhalation. It will expand pleasantly, a glow or cloud-like feeling in the brain field at the end of the exhalation. When you can rotate It up and down feel It with your Will (fixed sulfur). See It with your Imagination (volatile sulfur). Play with It your bird of Hermes.
In the beginning the inner circulation is a simple orbit. After some familiarity, you’ll find the direction of rotation can be reversed. In fact the inner circuit can be used to sublimate ching the Inner Microcosmic quintessence to power further psychic and spiritual transformations that reveal other mechanisms that enhance the microcosmic orbit. The remaining two gems of alchemical initiation will be revealed in future installments.
Lynn Osburn is co-author of Green Gold: the Tree of Life, Marijuana in Magic and Religion published by Access Unlimited. For more information email openi420@juno.com..

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Three Gems of Alchemical Initiation
Part 2: Sublimation of Ching, the Second Gem of Alchemy
By Lynn Osburn
The sublimation of ching is the second alchemical gemstone. When ching is sublimated through the inner circulation you can become aware of your subtle body. Chi circulates through the inner circulation. Ching can rise through the microcosmic orbit and enliven or activate the dormant subtle body. The subtle body is the complement of the gross (physical) body. When enlivened by the reverse flow of ching the dormant subtle body begins to develop. The old Taoist masters called this development of the immortal fetus.
Ching energy is produced naturally by your physical body. This natural product is sexual energy. Ching is creation power. As sexual energy it is unconsciously produced and driven by biological instinct instilled by the great mother Void Chaos. The physical portal for the production of this microcosmic quintessence is the sex organ systems in men and women. When these complementary powers intermingle through sexual intercourse a new life can be created. The gross (physical) life created is the embryo that can become a new human being provided the electromagnetic and biochemical cascade of matter in the embryo has enough shen to complete its course.
Physical life is created by the union of outward flowing semen in men with the transmigrating egg in women. This unconscious intercourse produces a new human being. When a man prevents the outward flow of semen during sexual practice while drawing the orgasmic energy upward the subtle body can become manifest. The subtle body is in this way enlivened with ching power. Being slowly coalesces there; the immortal fetus is born. Consciousness, feeling and sensation are able to precipitate there.
The Taoist alchemical classic Secret of the Golden Flower, details this process but it does not address the Prima materia --- sexuality --- openly. Classic Western alchemical texts never speak of sexuality. Instead symbolic sexuality is linked to processes going on inside of sealed laboratory equipment. Often a king and queen are pictured in cohabitation upon waters in an alchemical vessel. Those European adepts referred to the process as mysterium conjuctionis—mysterious conjunction.
This marriage of the King and Queen is seen as an allegory for the enlivening processes going on inside the alchemical vessel. Indeed many a chaste Medieval Christian alchemist was barred by religious prejudice from discovering even the possibility of sublimating orgasmic energy.
I was first exposed to the idea of sublimation of sexual energy when I read Taoist Yoga Alchemy and Immortality by Lu K’uan Yu. This is a translation of his teacher’s nineteenth century manuscript. I was a young man when I first read it and rejected the notion of sexual sublimation for it barred orgasmic ejaculation. That was antithetical to my sexual drive at that time. In fact sexuality and lusty thoughts were called evil in the text. Years later I discovered this negative attitude toward sex was an influence first from Buddhism then Christianity. I had all but forgotten about sublimation of sexual energy for alchemical purposes until I read the work of Mantak Chia, a modern master of Taoist alchemy from Thailand. I had been a journeyman alchemist for twenty years by then. I had been circulating chi for ten years but my old incredulity return when I first read his book, Taoist Secrets of Love, Cultivating Male Sexual Energy.
However, I had learned to circulate chi by syncretizing certain Rosicrucian breathing exercises with the circulation patterns outlined in Taoist Yoga Alchemy and Immortality. I was no longer a youth and approaching middle age. My sex drive had become somewhat tempered, and I had gained too much respect for the Tao to dismiss the idea of sublimating sexual energy as laid out by Mantak Chia. He was using the same Taoist microcosmic orbit to flux sexual energy. I studied the book and followed the exercises. I found that sublimating ching was not that difficult since rotating chi through the inner circulation had become second nature for me by then.
Sublimating ching can be dangerous. Ching is much denser power than chi. It travels up the spinal column concentrating subtle body base capacitor qualities in the medulla-cerebellum. From there It penetrates inward into the light gathering organ, the pineal gland; a pulsation is felt as the floating Point opens in the middle of the forehead. If the charge is sustained in the subtle capacitor, It then loads into the port and starboard shen channels saturating Sylvian brain fissures (Called the Supreme Ultimate and Immaterial Spirit respectively by the Taoist alchemists.). Ching in the shen channels can induce power surges into the optic nerves because of the proximity. That surge of energy can cause clusters of blood vessels to blow out. To avoid the danger of ching build-up in the shen channels one must circulate chi after sublimating ching. The excess ching in the subtle body is converted through circulation into life sustaining chi power.
I highly recommend reading Mantak Chia’s book(s) before proceeding. Sublimating ching is not harmless like circulating chi. If one adheres religiously to the traditional methods taught by Mantak Chia then sublimating ching is fairly safe. However the alchemy of ching power spills out well beyond the confines of the traditional methods. If you succeed in sublimating ching and create your own immortal fetus by awakening the subtle body you will become aware of the painful conundrums of sexual power.
To sublimate ching one must collect sexual energy then concentrate It. You do this by stimulation sexually to a point near orgasm. The closer to orgasm you get, the more ching there is. That energy builds in the groin area and must be drawn upward. This is accomplished by drawing in a deep breath while pulling the hot sexual energy up the spine through the inner circulation. This is the opposite direction as in circulating chi.
To keep the power from flowing into orgasmic energy you should clinch the buttocks and fists while pulling the energy upward. It first moves into a cavity near the bowels. Store It there and build another charge and store It the same way. Collective charges stored there from multiple surging concentrates until the sexual fluids that usually carry orgasmic energy become overcharged. Thus overcharged they will escape; the sages say do not spill your seed.
With the supercharge of ching collected stop the sexual gathering and concentrate on drawing the ching up the spine with each inhalation. You will feel It getting dense at the base of your skull. With each inhalation more of It will collect at the base of your skull until this subtle body basal capacitor is fully saturated with ching power. Then the power will jump to the center of your brain and cause a sensation in the middle of your forehead; that is the Floating Point Navigator opening. Should you have enough ching still rising to keep the capacitor charged the density fans out to the left and right saturating the Sylvian fissures above the ears. This signifies the shen generators are charging in the Lateral Ventricles. Should you have still more ching rising the density can be drawn to the crowning point at the top of your skull. Should that open you will know ONE and become Ion. (Personification in eternity)
This process can be seen in the following drawings. First: Ching power rising in the main channel saturating the brain in a man; from Taoist Secrets of Love Cultivating Male Sexual Energy, by Mantak Chia. Second: Ching power flowing in complete circuit in a woman. (from Healing Love Through the Tao, Cultivating Female Sexual Energy by Mantak & Maneewan Chia).
The Point at the top does not open easily and It is better not to open unless you have some shen to distill. If power rises to the crown do not leave It there. Rotate It down to the bottom between the stomach and the bowels. Do this by practicing the inner circulation. It will settle down and balance out in chi.
Once I had become proficient at sublimating ching, I realized how much the experience of the process revealed still more of the Emerald Tablet axioms.
...  Here is the essence of every Perfection in the world.  Its strength and power prevail when turned into earth; thou wilt separate the earth from fire, the subtle from the gross, gently and with great care.
It ascends from earth to heaven, descends again to earth and receives the power of the higher and the lower.  By this means, thou wilt have the glory of the world.  And because of this, all obscurity will flee from thee.  Within this is the power, most powerful of all powers.  For It will overcome all subtle things, and penetrate every solid thing.  Thus the world was created.  Wonderful adaptations will emerge from this; It is the Way.
When ching rises into the original cavity of Spirit behind and between the eyes insight and intuition evolve; one can perceive and feel the essence of every Perfection --- the mystery of ONE.
Sexual power is quite strong. It wants to get out and create. When you turn It within --- into your earth Its strength and power prevail. That means ching turned inward saturates the subtle body with strength and power thus enlivening It.
First, the (subtle) sexual sublimate energy must be separated from the (gross) material sexual secretion systems. This is done with great care (concentration) and no force is necessary -- just will power. It, the sexual energy sublimate, ascends from the groin (earth) to the original cavity of spirit in the head (heaven). It empowers the subtle body and receives the powers of the higher (insight, intuition, inductive configuration, deductive penetration, refined concentration, enhanced imagination).
Having empowered the higher, It descends to the lower, the original cavity of vitality above the crotch and below the kidneys, there It empowers the lower (cogent feeling and sensation, refined will power and emotions). Thus empowered and within the subtle body you will have the glory of the world. And through your evolution in the subtle body and because of the higher and lower development you will attain the most powerful of all powers: knowing the way of things.
Lynn Osburn is co-author of Green Gold: the Tree of Life, Marijuana in Magic and Religion published by Access Unlimited. For more information email openi420@juno.com..

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Three Gems of Alchemical Initiation
Part 3: Distillation of Shen, the Third Gem of Alchemy
by
Lynn Osburn







Shen is the manifestation power of existence. When Shen is distilled things manifest. When Shen is distilled within the subtle body transcendent evolution can be attained. The human being distills shen naturally. In the drawing to the left above are shown the ventricles of the brain where the alchemical distillation takes play. The mechanisms of the cerebro-spinal system are akin to the furnace and retort/receiver bodies used in mundane distillation. In this analogy the distillation chamber itself is in the brain. The natural production of shen within the human being is mind power. Do not think shen is mind for shen is much more than mind. Mind is a manifestation of shen.
 
The major religions and philosophies direct the pilgrim to calm the mind using the analogy of a still pond that reflects distortion free the mysterious transcendent inspiration of cosmic origin. The still pond reflector state is passive shen. When one receives the manifestation of passive shen --- the reflection of inspiring ideas upon the still mind, and then returns to the outer world and puts the ideas into action so that they become manifest, then one is using active shen power to manifest the idea (passive shen) in the world. Shen is the power to do things.
Will and imagination are fed by shen power. In alchemy will is fixed sulfur and imagination is volatile sulfur. Both are conditions of the alchemical soul. When you "imagized" the chi power in the circulation praxis of the first gemstone you were employing basic shen through volatile sulfur to manifest the chi power. However if you tried to entertain both concepts in the beginning the manifestation would more than likely fail thus discouraging you from further attempts.
The important thing in the first gemstone praxis is to feel the chi power; you cannot feel the chi power in the beginning if your natural shen power of mind manifests instead of the chi power: If your mind makes a phantasy of It losing the chi into an idle dream. Once you can feel the chi power in the circulation shen will ride with It instead of consuming It.
You use shen power through volatile sulfur to configure the concept of the inner circulation. You use shen power through fixed sulfur to set the inner circulation concept into motion. Imagination and will in this way stir spirit into motion. Moving spirit is chi. It is felt as vibration which is waveform energy. When you feel vibration in the circuits of the subtle body that is chi power energizing you. Chi power engenders feelings of calmness and serenity.
You use shen power through volatile sulfur to configure the ching sublimation concept. You use shen power through fix sulfur to hold back and redirect the natural pleasurable surge to orgasm during the ching praxis. You redirect your earthly ching power with fixed sulfur. Earthly ching power has an intimate affinity with fixed sulfur. It clings to fixed sulfur so will power can turn the direction of sexual energy --- will power can sublimate sexual energy into pure ching power.
Sublimated ching does not vibrate like chi power, It pulses and surges as discrete energy quanta more like bits than waveforms. When you feel the pulse as a fluid or gas-like plasma moving up your spine and packing density at the base of your skull that is ching power enlivening your subtle body. In this respect ching is likened to the alchemical salt that gives form to the subtle body so that It unites there.
After the chi/spirit, the ching/body and the shen/soul have each been separated from It by conscious awareness, feeling and sensation, so that one knows each power separately, They reunite as One in the subtle body which then evolves according to your nature.
First you used the natural spirit that moves all as a basis to empower your alchemical development --- you sent chi vibrating through your inner circulation. Second you used natural creation sensation to enliven your alchemical development --- you reversed the flow of ching recreating the inner circulation as the immortal fetus of your subtle alchemical body.
The alchemical development described thus far will take time to gestate through practice. Your new alchemical body --- immortal fetus will evolve. That evolution is unfolding manifestation and fed primarily by shen power.
True you will circulate chi daily to keep power in your channels. Not to do this is to invite general crapulence and senility, such is the path leading to mortality. The alchemical being that you now are will naturally avoid lethal intervals of toxic crapulence.
Also true you will continue to sublimate ching or evolution of the alchemical body will not have the creative power to manifest. You will become uninspired by sex without alchemy because you will either drain your partner of ching or drain your ching into your partner. The latter will not enliven the alchemical body of your sexual partner --- unless your partner is an alchemist. Instead your alchemical ching thus given to a non-initiate will be diverted into channels of physical vitality by unconscious mechanisms within your partner.
Continue Creation into Manifestation: This is the Power most powerful of all powers. This is distilling shen. When enough alchemical power has saturated the shen collectors in the ventricles of the brain, the left and right shen channels open like magnetic fields around parallel rods on either side of your head. That placid calm pond of a mind state upon which images manifest begins to heave like turbulent seas, until the shen rotates in toroidal motion. It boils away from the rotating center like waters separating in an alchemical retort. These waters of shen distill the alchemical body through space/time into Eternity where one is ONE at the center.
One is now able to go forth from here to Eternity and return without transition through death the usual route. Pilgrims describe near death experiences many with similar circumstances. A white light or tunnel appears. The pilgrims travel into the light or tunnel. As they go revelations impress themselves upon these travelers. At some point for some reason or circumstance the person returns to the Macrocosm with visions that affect their lives profoundly.
I have never been able to distill enough shen from sublimating ching to open the shen channels. You can charge them with density and refine your powers of perception and concentration, but the channels will not unfold. I believe it is Entropy that keeps the conversion ratio too low to open the channels. When the Supreme Ultimate and the Immaterial Spirit unfold, the Point at the crown of your head opens and the light or tunnel or shaft leading to the Cosmic Egg is revealed.
Distilling shen from separating chi and sublimating ching is not complete. The separated chi is the Microcosmic outer alchemical agent, and the sublimated ching is the Microcosmic inner alchemical agent. One must also prepare the Macrocosmic inner and outer alchemical agents and combine them with the Microcosmic alchemical agents. Then the circulation will have enough power to distill shen to the Supreme Ultimate and Immaterial Spirit.
The Macrocosmic inner alchemical agent is prepared by the body in the form of saliva. The Taoist alchemists called this "enchymoma". The Macrocosmic outer alchemical agent must be prepared from a substance found outside the body in one of the three kingdoms: mineral, plant, or animal.
When the elixir is ready to use one should begin separating chi into the inner circulation. After a few rotations smell the aroma of the elixir on the inhalation. Feel the energy that is added to the chi. At the end of the exhalation place a few drops in your mouth on the tongue. Mix with saliva and inhale through the nose and do the next rotation. Upon the exhalation as the charge rises more saliva will flood the mouth. Mix it with the elixir. When you have enough saliva swallow at the inhalation and draw this fusion into the circulation. Draw some of the vapors from your mouth into the stream of air going into your lungs. Let the alchemical fusion expand up the front channel.
Rotate as long as you like; stop when you will. For more energy add a few drops to the circulation. If you add enough of the elixir the energy rotating will begin to distill. You will feel It rising like dragon fire up the center channel (very colorful but does not burn). It distills into the lateral ventricles. The pressure expands out the Sylvian fissures above the ears. The dragon wings open feeling like great magnetic fields extending about one foot from the head. More fire and the dragon wings unfold again and extend the field down the length of the body.
The energy is now flowing up the center channel out and down the wing channels (Supreme Ultimate and Immaterial Spirit) and drawn back up the center channel. The shen distills into an energy toroid with an intense void in the center. A portal opens in the center of the void and shen distills into Eternity.

Staying with the Void

From *The Reality of Being: The Fourth Way of Gurdjieff* by Jeanne De Salzmann

I have a new impression of myself but it is fragile. I am not sufficiently steeped in the sensation of being a living Presence, and the feeling revealed here is still too weak. Tensions reappear. I feel them. But I know what they separate me from, and because I know it, they fall away. This is a movement of ebb and flow in which my feeling becomes stronger. It loses its negative and aggressive elements, and opens more and more to a sense of the subtle, the higher, a sense of life itself. My intelligence has to understand the meaning of my tensions, and something in me needs to leave more and more space - not out of obligation but from necessity, a necessity of my being. I seek to understand this state without-tension which brings me closer to the void, to my essence.

I become aware of a world of finer vibrations. I feel them, I have the sensation of them, as if certain parts of me were irrigated, vivified, spiritualized by them. Yet I am still not entirely under the influence of these vibrations. I realize this. But I feel an ever greater need not to resist them. My usual "I" has lost its authority and, as another authority makes itself felt, I see that my life has meaning only if I am attuned to it. In working for this accord, I feel as though situated in a closed circuit and that, if I could remain here long enough, the miracle of my transformation would take place.

In order to feel these fine vibrations, I must come to real stillness of the body, a state without any tension where the thought is simply a witness which without comment sees all that happens. I will then understand what it means to have pure sensation-a sensation with no intervening image. My body is under this vision with no tension. Relaxation appears by itself as my seeing becomes clear, and with it I feel that separate islands of energy in me need to be more deeply related. This fine sensation is a sign of incarnation, the moment of penetration when the spirit materializes and takes on a definite density.

In a more objective state, where an order is established, my breathing can take on new meaning. Only in this state am I capable of receiving the finer elements of the air and absorbing them. I feel the energy circulate freely in my body, with nothing stopping or deflecting it, nothing projecting it outside or fixing it inside. It flows in a kind of circular movement, which takes place without my intervening. I feel it as a movement in which I exist. I discover my breathing---the absorption and discharge of energy.

I breath in…….I breathe out.
I know that I breathe in…..I know that I breathe out.
In a quiet body I breathe in…… In a quiet body I breathe out.
Slowly I breathe in……. Slowly I breathe out.

I am awake to this breathing that is taking place in me. I am awake to my body. I do not separate them from each other.

In a light body, I breathe in……. In a light body, I breathe out.

The body feels lighter. I let myself exhale completely, all the way to end.

Without avidity, I breathe in…. Without avidity, I breathe out.

I feel the impermanence of the movement. I do not seek to hold back anything whatsoever.

Feeling, free, I breathe in….. Feeling, free, I breathe out.

Words and forms lose their power of attraction. A kind of clarity lights the state I am in. I become deeply quiet in order to awaken to what I am.

Sensing theVoid

The constant attention should be on the Void. Or the feeling of the Self. To ignore all the other attendant impurities of the mind like visual imagery or logical formulations.
Just as I sense the essence of the pain stripping aside the part of the body where the pain is, I must just stay with the feeling of the Void. Feel its weight and its sensation on "whatever is sensing it".


The process of keeping the energy high to remember this task and to stay with the sensing of the Void for a longer period. Then may be God will hear the Prayer.

Gorakh and Masyendra

The Gorakhbodh

This is a very obscure text of the Nathas, conducted in the form of questions from Gorakh (Gorakhnath) to Macchendra (Matsyendranath). The English translation, from a Hindi text, was published at the beginning of the century and is out of copyright.
Gorakh -- O Lord (Svami), you are the Master Teacher (Satguru Gosain), and I am but a disciple: may I put a question, which you would kindly reply to and resent not? To start with, what ideal (lacch) should the disciple put before him? Do tell me for you are the true Teacher.
Macchendra -- Let the unattached (awadhu, avadhuta) live at the monastery (hat) or be on the road, resting in the shadow of the trees; he should renounce desire, cruelty, greed, delusion, and the illusion of Samsar (Kama, Krodha, Lobha, Moha and Samsar ki Maya); he should hold converse (gosht) with himself and contemplate the Endless (Ananta); he should sleep little and eat little. In the beginning the disciple should live thus. Thus speaks Macchendra. [2]
G What should he see, what contemplate, and what treat as the essence (sar); with what should he shave his head and with the knowledge of what should he try to cross (the ocean of Samsar)?
M He should see himself, contemplate the Endless (Ananta), and fix upon Reality as the essence; he should shave his head with (or after receiving) the word of the teacher (Guru ka Shabda), and should cross over with the aid of Divine knowledge (Brahma Gyana). [4]
G What is the teaching (upadesh) of the Guru's order or doctrine (Ades)? Where does the void (Sunya) reside? Who is the Guru of the word (Shabda)?
M The most wonderful (anupam) is the teaching of the Guru (Ades); the void (Sunya) resides within us and Realisation (parcha or parichaya) is the Guru of the word (shabda). [6]
G What is the form (rupa) of the mind (mana)? What is the appearance (akar) of the vital breath (pavana)? What is the direction (disa) of the ten and through which door can the control be effected?
M The void (sunya) is the fore of the mind; the appearance of vital breath (pavan) is invisibility (nirakar); the direction of the ten is unsayable (alekh) and control lies through the tenth door. [8]
G Which is the root (mula) and which the branch (bela)? Who is the Guru and who the disciple; with what essence (tatt) can one go about alone?
M Mind is the root and vital breath is the branch; the word (shabda) is the Guru and attention (surat or surta) is the disciple. With the essence called deliverance (nirbana tat) Gorakhnath wanders about, himself in himself. [10]
G What is the seed (biraja) and what the field (khetra)? What is direct hearing (satvan)? What is true vision? What is Joga and what is the method (Jugti)? What is liberation (mocch)? And what is salvation (mukti)?
M The word (Mantra) is the seed; perception (mati) is the womb or land; and attention (surti) is direct hearing, and discrimination (nirti) is true vision; the ocean (Uram) is Joga and the earth (Dhuram) is the method; light (joti) is liberation and the refulgence (Juala) is salvation. [12]
G Which is the tree without a trunk, and which is the parrot without wings? Which is the dam (palu) without a shore (tir), and who died without death (kal)?
M Vital breath (pavana) is the tree without a trunk; mind is the parrot (sua) without wings; constancy (dhiraj) is the dam without a shore; sleep is dying without death. [14]
G In what house (ghar) is moon (chanda) and in what is the sun (sur)? In what house does Time play music (Tur, a musical instrument)? Where do the five elements (tat) have equipoise (sam rahai)?
M The moon in the mind; the sun in the vital breath; in the void (sunya) Time plays on the musical instrument (tura) and in the house of knowledge the five elements reside in equipoise (sam). [16]
G What is the New Moon (amavas) and what manifests (pariba)? Which or where is the great elixir (maha rasa) and whereto with it do we mount? At what place does the mind reside in the state of self-transcendence (unmani)?
M The sun (ravi) should be treated as the darkest night; the moon should be made manifest; the great elixir of the lower (ardh) should be taken to the upper (urdh); in the heaven within us (gagan) the mind resides in self-transcendence. [18]
G What destroys the bad word (kusabda) and where does the good word (susabda) reside? On what side (mukha) does the vital breath of twelve fingerbreadths reside?
M The good word swallows or catches the bad word and itself resides within (nirantar); the vital breath of twelve fingerbreadths is controlled (rahai) through the word of the Guru. [20]
G Who is the Adiguru? Who is the husband of the earth (dhartri)? What is the home of knowledge (gyana)? Which is the door (duvar) of the void (sunn)?
M The eternal beginningless (anadi) is the Adiguru; heaven (anbar) is the husband of earth; Awake-awareness (Chetan) is the home of knowledge, and realisation (parcha) is the door of the void. [22]
G Through the realisation (parchai) of what is the attachment with the Illusion (maya moha) broken; how can the residence of the moon (Sisihar) be pierced; how is the dam (bandha) applied and how can the body (kandha) be made immortal (ajar var)?
M When realisation (parchai) comes to the mind, attachment to the world ceases; with the control of the working of vital breath the moon (sisihar) is destroyed; the acquisition of real knowledge (gyana) applies the dam and the realisation of the teacher (Guru parchai) gives us immortality. [24]
G Where do mind, vital breath, the word (shabda) and the moon reside?
M The mind resides in the heart (hirdai); vital breath resides in the navel; the word (shabda) resides in the will (ruci); the moon resides in the heaven (gagan). [25]
G If there had been no heart (hirda) where would the mind have rested, composed? Had there been no navel where, would have vital breath rested unmoved? Had there been no form (rupa) where would have the word (Shabda} resided? Without a heaven where would have the moon been?
Without the navel, the air would have resided in the formless (Nirakar); without will, the word (shabda) would have resided (rahata) in the unmanifest (Akula); without the heaven, the moon would have resided in desire (abhika).
G Had there been no night, where would the day have come from? Without the day, where would the night merge? When the lamp is extinguished, where does light dwell?
M Without night, the day would have merged into Sahaj; had there been no day, the night would have passed into (Sahaj); on the extinguishing of the lamp, the light passes into the omnipresent (nirantar); had there been no vital breath, then the body of vital breath (pran purus) would have resided in the void. [30]
G Who is the creator of the body (kaya); wherefrom has light (tej) been created? What is the mouth (?muha or muda?) of Divine knowledge (Brahma Gyana)? How can the Unseeable be seen?
M The Absolute (Brahma) is the creator of the body (kaya); out of truth (sat) has effulgence (tej) been created; the void is the mouth (muda or muha) of Divine knowledge (Brahma Gyana); and through the Sadguru and the disciple realisation my the unseeable be made visible. [ 32]
G How many lakhs (hundreds of thousands) of moons are there in the body?. How does fragrance reside in the flower? Where does the ghee hide in the milk? How does the soul (jiva) conceal itself in the body?
M There are two lakhs of moons in the body; fragrance is the conscious(ness) (chetan) in the flower; the ghee is immanent in the milk; the soul (jiva) is the all- pervasiveness in the body. [34]
G Had there been no body where would the sun and the moon have resided? Had there been no flower, where would the fragrance have been? Had there been no milk where would the ghee have been? Had there been no body, where would the spirit have been?
M Without the body, the sun and the moon would have been omnipresent; without the flower, fragrance would have dwelt in the (Anhad); without the milk, the ghee (ghiv or ghee) would have resided in the void; without the body, the spirit would have been in the Supreme Void (Param Sunn). [36]
G Where do the moon and the sun dwell, where the essence, the root of the word (nad) and the vital power (bind)? Where does the Hamsa (swan) mount up for drinking water? To what place (ghar) do you bring the reversed power (ulti shakti) to rest?
M The moon resides in the upper (urdha) and the sun in the lower (ardha); the essence, the nad(a) and bind(u) dwells in the heart; to the heaven goes the swan (hans) for drinking water, and the reversed power (Shakti) reverts to the Self, its real, original home. [38]
G Where does nad(a) rise; where does it acquire equipoise (sam); how is it made to stand still, and where is it finally merged?
M Nad(a) rises from the Unconditioned (Avigata); gains equipoise in the void; you can stop it through the vital breath and it vanishes, unites with the Formless (Niranjana). [40]
G If the nad(a) sounds not, if the power acts not, if the heaven is not there to draw our hope, were there neither nad(a) nor bind(u), then where would the man of vital breath (Prana Purusha) reside?
M Nad(a) sounds, bind(u) moves; the heaven (gagan) attracts desire; but were there neither nad(a) nor bind(u) then breath would reside in the omnipresent (nirantar). [42]
G When form dissolves and the Formless remains, when water becomes air, when there is neither sun nor moon, where does the Hamsa dwell?
M The Sahaja hans(a) resides after the play in the Person of the void (Sunn hans); when the form becomes Formless then the spirit (hans) resides in the Supreme light (Param Joti). [44]
G What is the root (mula) of the rootless (Amul)? Where does the root reside? Who is the Guru of the goal (pada)?
M The void is the root of the rootless; the root resides in the omnipresent (Nirankar); the Guru of the goal is liberation (Nirban). [46]
G Where does the vital breath (prana) rise? Wherefrom does the mind come? How is the speech (vacha) born and where does it dissolve (viliyate)?
M The birth of the mind is from the Formless (Avagat), the vital breath from the mind, and speech from the breath; speech is dissolved in the mind. [48]
G Which is the lake and which the lotus? How can we ward off Kal(time or death)? How can we reach the Unseeable, Unreachable (Agochar) world?
M Mind is the lake and air is the lotus; by becoming upwards-faced (Urdh-mukhi) you can ward off Kal; through knowing the lower and the upper one my become one with the Unknowable (Agochar liv lahai). [50]
G Which is the difficult, and which the easy; what is union (sandh), and through what nerve centre (chakra) can the moon be made stable? How can the conscious mind attain to self-transcendence?
M The Pure (Anila) and the Stainless (Vimal) are the difficult and easy forms of union (sandh); the dam is to be applied above the chaki nerve-centre (chakra); the always-awake can attain to self-transcendence (unmani). [52]
G How came about birth? How did the first consciousness begin (ad ki surat)? How was I born?
M As oil is in the sesame seed, as fire is in the wood, as fragrance in the flower, so too resides the spirit (devata) in the body (deh). [54]
G What drives ahead the conch-like (sankhini)? Where does the elixir in the arched vein (banka nala) go? As the breather goes to sleep, where does the vital breath (prana) in the body (pinda) side?
M True spontaneity (sahaj subhai) can drive the conch-like (sankhini); the arched vein (banka nala) resides in the navel; as the breather goes to sleep; the vital breath in the body resides in its own shadow or resides undivided (api chhaya or aparchhinna). [56]
G At what nerve centre (chakra) is the moon stabilised? At what nerve centre (chakra) is the union or penetration (sandh) applied? What nerve centre (chakra) controls (niredha) the vital air? What centre (chakra) imparts knowledge (pramodh) to the mind? At what centre (chakra) should attention (dhyana) he centred (dhariye)? At what centre (chakra) should one rest?
M The higher (Urdh chakra), the lower (Ardh chakra), the Pashchima (west) centre, the heart centre, the throat (kantha) centre the Gyana (Agya) chakra.
G Which is the garden, the town and the mandal? In which city is the Guru? If I forget it, how am I to cross over?
M Whoso gives up speech has achieved the void of the manifoldness (maya sunn): in contemplating that, one rises above good and evil; by an understanding of Shiva and Shakti, one may attain to self-transcendence (unmani). [60]
G By what stalk of the lotus (nala) can the liquid (Siva) be drawn up? How does the soul (jiva) drink it? How can one residing in the womb of the mother, drink the elixir?
M It is collected through the Shankhini Nadi; the soul (jiva) resides in the Sushumna nadi; while residing in the womb of the mother he drinks it through the banka nala. [62]
G What is the house (graha) and what the habitation; in what womb does he remain for ten months? Through what mouth does he drink water and through what mouth, milk? In what direction was the body born?
M The Pure, the Formless (Anil) is the house (graha) and the Unconditioned (avagat), the habitation (has); in the womb of the Beyond (Atit) he remains for ten months; through mind he has water and through vital air (pavan) he drinks elixir or milk (amrit); in the direction of Omkar the body takes birth.
G In what void (sunn) is he born? In what void (sunn) is he absorbed?
M He is born in the Sahaja Void and the Satguru gave him instruction at the void of nearness (Samip Sunn); he then got absorbed in the void of unattachment (Atit Sunn). He then explains to you the essence of the supreme void (Param Sunna). [88]
G How can one attain to Samadhi? How can one get rid of the disturbing factors (upadhi)? How can one enter the fourth (Turiya) state? How can one make one's body (kandh) changeless and deathless?
M The young person (bala) enters Samadhi through the mind; he gets rid of the disturbances through the vital breath (pavan); he acquires the fourth state (Turiya) through attention (surat) or realisation (Gyana) and through obeying, turning to, the Guru (Guru mukh) he attains to immortality. [68]
G Who sleeps, who wakes, who goes to the ten directions? Wherefrom does the vital breath arise? How does it bring sound from the lips, throat and the palate (talika or taluka)?
M The mind, or the absorbed (liv) sleeps; the vital breath or the conscious (chetan) awakes; imagination (kalpana) goes out to the ten directions. From the navel the air arises, it rises and produces sounds from the lips, throat and the palate (taluka). [70]
G What is the conscious? What is the essence (sar)? What is sleep and what is death? By realising what (parchai) does one sustain the elements (tat)?
M The light (Joti) is conscious; fearlessness is the awakened essence. Waking is birth and sleeping is death; the five elements dwell in light. [72]
G Who speaks, who sleeps; in what form does he seek himself? In what form does he remain the same through the ages?
M Word (shabda) speaks; attention (surat) sleeps; he seeks himself in an Unseeable (adekh) form and in the Form without Form he remains the same through ages. [ 74 ]
G How does the mind acquire virtues? How does the vital air come and go? How does the fountain (nihjar) rise from the moon and how does Time or Death (kal) go to sleep?
M In the heart (hirdai) the mind acquires the many virtues; in the navel the vital air starts its coming and going (Avagavan); contemplating itself (apmukhi) he makes the fountain play; contemplating itself Time or Death goes to sleep. [76]
G At which void (sunn) does light reverse; from which void does speech arise; which void is the essence of the three worlds; through which void can one cross over?
M The void of eagerness, the void of fearlessness, the void of self-mastery, and the void of detachment. (Urga, Anbhai, Prabhu, Atit). [78]
G Where does hunger arise and where food? Where is sleep born and where death?
M From desire (mansa) arose hunger and from hunger, food; from food sleep and from sleep, death. [80]
G At which lotus does the Hamsa (hans) inhale and exhale (sas, usas); at which lotus does Hamsa rest; at what lotus does he perform worship (puja) and at what lotus does he see the Unseeable (Alakh)?
M The navel lotus, the heart lotus, the centre (madh) lotus, the lotus Beyond (Achint). [82]
G What is truth? Do tell me, please, O Guru Pandit. What is the condition or direction of the mind and the breath? How can one swim across (the ocean of Samsar) with their help?
M Progression from mere seeing, to divine or spiritual perception (dibya drisht); from knowledge (gyana) towards realisation (vigyma); the teacher and the pupil have the same body; if realisation (parcha) comes, then there will he no straying or return. [84]
G Wherefrom do inhalation and exhalation arise? Where does the Param Hans reside? At what place does the mind reside constantly stable?
M They rise from the lower (Ardh); at the higher (Urdh) the Supreme Swan (Param hans) resides; in the Sahaja Void the mind is ever in equipoise. In the realisation of the word (Shabda parchai) the mind remains in equipoise. [86]
G How should one come, how go; how to collect oneself and remain absorbed; how can one stabilise one's mind and one's body?
M He should come and go in the void and in the void (sunn) he should collect himself and remain absorbed; in the Sahaja Void the body and the mind remain unchanged. [ 88 ]
G Where does Shiva reside and where Shakti? Where resides vital breath (prana) and where the embodied being ( Jiva) ? At what place can one have the realisation of them?
M At the lower (Ardh) resides Shakti and at the higher (Urdh) Shiva; inside resides vital breath (prana) and further inside the embodied being (Jiva); by going still further in, one may attain to a realisation of them. [90]
G How should one sit and how walk, how speak and how meet; how should one deal with one ' s body?
M He should sit, walk, speak and meet awake and aware (surat mukh); with his attention and discrimination (surat or nirat) thus handled, he should live fearlessly. [92]
G What is the word (shabda); what is attention (supat); what is discrimination (nirat)? What is the dam? How can one remain stable amidst duality?
M The Beginningless, the Soundless (Anahad) is the word; right awareness is attention (surat); independence (niralanb) is discrimination (nirat); let him apply the check; he will then live as Unity amidst Duality. [94]
G Who can tread a path without feet? Who can see without eyes? Who can hear without ears? Who can speak without words?
M Contemplation (vichar) can tread without feet; discrimination (nirat) can see without eyes; attention (supat) can hear without ears; the Soundless (Anhad) can speak without words. [96]
G Which posture (asan)? What knowledge (gyana)? How should the young disciple (bala) meditate (dhyan)? By what means can he enjoy the bliss of the Unconditioned Being (Avagata)?
M Contentment (santokh) is the posture (asana); contemplation is the knowledge (gyana); he should try to rise above his physical being in (or for) his meditation; through carrying out the behest of the Guru he can have the joy of the Unconditioned Being (Avagata). [98]
G How to have contentment and contemplation and meditation that goes beyond the physical? How can I bend my mind to them?
M Contentment comes from fearlessness (nirbhai); thinking from avoidance of attachment or realisation (anbhai); he should meditate within his body to rise above the body; by turning to the Teacher (Guru) one can bend one's mind to them. [100]
G What is the cleansing (Dhoti)? What is conduct (Achar)? Through what recitation (Japa) does the mind come to rid itself of restless thoughts (Vikaras)? How can one become unattached and fearless?
M Meditation is purification; right thinking, discrimination leads to right action; through the Ajapa Japa ( = Ha Sa) the mind rids itself of restless thoughts; by becoming unattached one can become fearless. [ 102]
G Who is the Omkar and who is the Self (ap); who is the mother and who is the father? How can the river (darya) enter the mind?
M The word (Shabda) is the One (Omkar); light (Joti) is the Self; the void (Sunn, Surat) is the mother and consciousness (Chit or Chaitan) is the father; steadiness (nishchai -- without anxiety) causes the river to flow in the mind. [ 104 ]
G How can one carry out true living (rahini) and how can one carry on meditation? Where is the immortal elixir? How can one drink it? How can one keep the body for ever?
M By turning to the higher (Urdha) or the mind, you can attain right living; by turning to Shakti you can achieve right meditation; by turning to the heaven within (gagan) you can have the elixir of immortality (Amirasa) and by turning to conscious activity (chit) you can drink it. By relinquishing desire, one can gain the immortal body (bidehi rahai). [106]
G How should one come and go; how can one defeat death? How can one reside in light?
M One should turn to Sahaja; one should go by turning to Shakti; by becoming wingless one can eat away death; one can always reside in light by being without breath (niswasa). [ 108]
G What is body, what is breath; what Person (purukh) should I meditate upon? At what place does mind transcend Time?
M Air is the body and the mind is the breath (force); we should meditate on the Supreme Person (Param Purukh). In Samadhi the mind goes beyond the reach of Time. [110]
G Which is the key and which is the lock; who is old and who is young (bala)? Where does mind remain awakened (chetan)?
M The wordless (nih-shabda) is the key and the word (shabda) is the lock; the unconscious one (achet) is old; the conscious one is young; mind in self- transcendence (unman) is ever aware (chetan). [112]
G Who is the practitioner (sadhak) and who the perfected (Siddh)? What is illusion and what is magic? How can one drive away deception from one's mind?
M Attention is the practitioner and the word is the adept; "I am" is the illusion (Maya) and "he is" is the magic (riddh). To destroy deception or duality one should reside within. [114]
G Which is the mould, and which is the calx of tin? Which is the ornament and how may it be beautified? How should self-transcendence (unmani) reside changeless with that?
M Knowledge (gyana) is the mould; vital breath is the calx (beng); light is the ornament which makes it beautiful; self-transcendence (unmani) should reside with That steadfastly, unchangingly. [116]
G Which is the temple and who is the god (deva); how to worship it? How should one reside there with the five unholy ones?
M The void is the temple; mind is the god; one should serve Him by being within (nirantar); with the five one should reside in self- transcendence (Unman). [ 118]
G Which is the temple, which the door; which is the image and who is the Unfathomable (Apar)? By what method of worship can the mind transcend itself (Unman rahai)?
M The void is the temple; Shabda is the door; Light is the image; the Flame (Jvala) is the Unfathomable (Apar); through turning to the form of the Formless (Arupa) or to the Guru one can reside self-transcendent, or fathom the secrets. [120]
G Which is the lamp and which is the light? What is the wick wherein the oil resides? How can the lamp be made inextinguishable?
M Knowledge (Gyana) is the lamp; the word (shabda) is the light (prakash); contentment (santokh -- santosha) is the wick in which the oil resides; one should destroy duality and be without partiality (akhandit). [122]
G What goes slow and what goes fast? Who revolves and what is the find? In what place can one be fearless?
M Steadiness of mind (dhiraj) goes slow; restless thought (vikara) goes fast; surat (attention) revolves (phurti) and truth (sar) is the find. [124]
G Who is a Yogi? How should he live in equipoise? Who is an enjoyer (Bhogi) and how should he acquire? How does pain rise out of pleasure and how can one patiently suffer pain?
M Mind is the Jogi; let him live in self-transcendence; the great elixir will come to him and he will enjoy all pleasures; in that elixir is the indivisible (akhandit) pain; the word (shabda) of the Guru secures the patience to suffer it. [126]
G Which is the self (Atma), what comes and goes? Which is the self, what is absorbed in the void? What is the self, what stays changeless in the three worlds? By knowing whom can one become one of the fifty-two heroes (bavan bir)?
M The self of vital breath (pavan atma) comes and goes; the mind-self is absorbed in the void; the knowledge-self resides unchanged in the three worlds; by knowing (parchai) the Guru one becomes one of the fifty-two heroes. [128]
G What is the life (Jiva) of the mind? What is the support (besas) of that life (jiva)? What is the basis of that support? What is the form of the Brahma?
M The life (jiva) of the mind is the vital air and the support of the embodied being (jiva) is the void; the basis (adhar) of that support (besas) is the form of Brahma (= Absolute); and the form of the Brahma is unthinkable (Achintya). [130]
G Through which centre can one make one's body immortal? Through which centre can one attain to the Unknowable dam (Agochar bandh)? Through which centre can the Hamsa be liberated (Hans nirodh)? Through which centre can the mind be instructed? Which centre gives pleasure? Which centre brings on the Samadhi?
M The anus (Mula) centre; the penis (Guda) centre; the navel (Nabhi) centre; the heart centre; the throat centre and the head (Nilata) centre. He who knows the meaning of these six chakras, he is the Cause, he the Deva. [132]
He is a Yogi who controls (sadhita) the mind and the vital air (pavana); he is not stained by evil. He is not seized of merit. [133]

Artwork is © Jan Bailey, 1996-2006. Translations are © Mike Magee 1996-2006.

onstruction of Sri Yantra                 Back

Describe a circle, with an imaginary vertical line of a suitable length as its diameter.
Divide the diameter into forty-eight equal parts and mark off the sixth, twelfth, seventeenth, twentieth, twenty-third, twenty-seventh, thirtieth, thirty-sixth and forty-second divisions from the top. Draw nine chords, at right angles to the diameter, through the nine points marked off, and number them accordingly.
Rub off 1/16th part of No. 1,  5/48ths of No. 2,  1/3rd of No. 4,  3/8th of No. 5,  1/3rd of No. 6,  1/12th of No.8, and  1/16th of No. 9,  at both ends of each line.
Draw triangles with lines, Nos. 1, 2, 4, 5, 6, 8 and 9 as bases and the middle points of Nos. 6, 9, 8, 7, 2, 1 and 3 respectively as their apexes.
Draw also the two triangles with Nos. 3 and 7 as their bases and the lower and the upper extremeties of the diameter as apexes respectively.
In the middle of the innermost triangle place the bindu.
Thus we get forty-three triangles pointing outwards, composed of one in the middle, eight triangles around it, two sets of ten triangles around the eight triangles, one set around the other, and fourteen triangles around them.
Then, by marking off 16 points in the circumference equidistant from one another, commencing from the upper extremity of the diameter and constructing one petal over each of them, form the eight-petalled lotus.
Then, circumscribe a circle touching the outer extremity of the petals. Divide the circumference of the circle so described into 32 equal divisions and draw symmetrically sixteen petals over them, as before.
Then circumscribe a circle round the sixteen-petalled lotus, as before, and enclose the second circle so described in two concentric circles at equal distances from each other.
Construct three squares about the outermost circle, with sides equidistant from each other, and the innermost square not to touch the outermost circle. Mark off four doorways on the four sides, each equidistant from either extremeties, and rub off the interspaces.
The figure thus formed is the shrIcakra. The centre of the circle is known as the bindu. VAmakeshwara tantra says that the five triangles with their apexes pointing downwards are indicative of the shaktI and the four triangles with their apexes pointing upwards are of shiva.
According to some traditions the distance from the bindu  to the innermost circle should equal the distance from the innermost circle to the outer gate, and the gates should be left open. This will result in this form.

Quotes regarding Movement

"The body has to be in the work ... the body has to be in the work...."-

. "It is the sound produced by the pianist that determines everything, it is this sound that has to complete the inner process brought into action by the movements of the dancers. “

Lucid Dreaming(From the Mnemonic Induction of Lucid Dreams

he final part of the MILD technique is the most fascinating. After setting the intention to lucid dream, the single most important goal of your subconscious is to control your dreams. Now, imagine what it would be like to realize you are dreaming. Imagine you are back in the last dream you can remember and re-live the ending.
But this time, become conscious within the dream. Look around you and see everything in high definition. Smell the scent of the air. Feel the ground underfoot. Engage all your senses. This is the key to increasing self awareness in dreams.
This powerful visualization technique is excellent for becoming lucid, especially if you do it as you fall asleep. Sometimes you will find the dream world literally unfolds around you. Other times you will fall asleep and dream of this memory later on in the night.
That is the secret to Mnemonic Induction of Lucid Dreams. The very last thought you have before falling asleep is about lucidity.

Notes from Joseph Azize

Jane Heap
Jane Heap / Notes, Jane Heap, anonymously edited by Annie-Lou Staveley and David Kherdian, 1983 and 2002, Two Rivers Press, Aurora, ISBN 089756023X
Overview
This is an edition of the notes Jane Heap prepared before delivering her talks to her pupils in the Gurdjieff ideas and methods. They are not ‘to introduce the ideas’, but ‘towards practical application of the ideas’. Her pupils had already learned the theoretical outlines, and were now participating in groups (the Gurdjieff schools generally organize pupils into ‘groups’ for collective study of the applied methods). The fact that these notes were not written for publication makes them more valuable, because we eavesdrop, as it were, on Jane thinking to herself about how she can address the practical needs of her pupils.
Gurdjieff’s ideas can only ever be superficially understood without an attempt to apply them to oneself. One finds in this volume, to an extraordinary degree, evidence of knowledge and practice united in work – which I would define as ‘informed action directed to a constructive aim’ (see George Adie p. 28). Although written as a number of chains of thought, not as one thematic exercise, the contents of this book are probably the greatest exposition of the ‘technique of techniques’ we will ever have.
Details
There is a table of contents, a two page introduction by Michael Currer-Briggs (whom Dr Lester, Jane’s pupil and physician, described to me as Jane’s ‘right hand man’), a large number of extracts from Jane’s private notes, with minimally intrusive editing by Mrs Staveley (one of Jane’s pupils, whom Jane effectively ‘graduated’ from her group before her death), and David Kherdian (Mrs Staveley’s pupil, and an acclaimed literary talent). Pages 87-95 comprise a collection of Jane’s aphorisms. The text is organized into readings of between one and ten pages, with italic sub-headings at various points. This is good, because the presentation is intense and compressed, so the sectioned layout assists the reader to select and study integrated units of related thoughts.
The volume is an attractive hard cover, with thick paper cover and plastic protection, approx. 6 ½ by 8 inches, with oil print on the endpapers. It comprises 95 pages printed on a slightly creamy, textured, top quality paper. The original 1983 edition was handset. Except, I think, that the first edition had leather trimmings, the 2002 edition is an exact facsimile reproduction of the first. Information about Jane, her style of teaching, and the publication of these notes and others, is found on the fly-leaves. The excellent choice of the paper, print and binding were the work of David Kherdian and his wife Nonny Hogrogian, a celebrated artist. However, the entire group at Two Rivers Farm were concerned in various aspects of its compilation and printing. To see and hold it, one feels that one is in the presence of a product of respect and careful attention, even down to the good use made of the fly-leaves.
Background
At the outset, I should observe that there is another book of Jane Heap’s notes, The Notes of Jane Heap, which, although also published by Two Rivers Press, was edited by Michael Currer-Briggs and others of Jane’s London pupils, not by Mrs Staveley. That is different from the book I am reviewing, although almost everything I say about the contents of this volume would apply to it, too. There is a significant overlap between the contents of the two books. The chief difference is that the ‘London notes’ lack even the subtle editing of this volume, and that, I think, is advantageous in that the notes are even more concise, but then, sometimes they’re almost impenetrable. That volume is a nice hard cover, but as an artefact, it is not in the same league as this masterpiece.
I have seen the typed transcript of all Jane’s notes, and it’s fairly apparent from their contents that some of them, especially the “Black Book”, can only have been meant for her own purposes, and not even in preparation for addressing her groups. But this book does not include those most private notes: this volume consists of notes which Jane wrote in longhand when preparing to give talks to her groups.
In August 1973, some nine years after Jane’s death, some of her pupils, having already provided Jeanne de Salzmann with a complete copy of the typed transcripts, met with her in Switzerland to discuss what use they might make of the material. And it is fortunate that they did, because Madame challenged them to produce their best. I do not just mean that she issued a challenge: anyone can do that. De Salzmann helped them probe deeply for their truest, best effort, as is apparent from the extracts below. It must have been an intense two days for these people. The notes of the meeting with Madame de Salzmann record her as saying on the first day:
This is something none of the other books have. There is plenty published about Ideas but not about How to work. Perhaps the thing to do is to prepare a small volume on this. Then Mme Salzmann will show it to the older ones – Tracol, Mme Lannes, Deselle – to see if it would help. We must be more DYNAMIC.
The capitals are as in the notes of that meeting, provided to me by the late Dr Lester. De Salzmann went on to say:
We must remember that what we do will be for the benefit of Jane – editing and shortening – and not hold back or hold on to the old memories because we were there – were taught by her. We must remember that the book will be read by people who never knew or saw Jane. For this reason we must remember that we have to insure that the book has IMPACT. (Jane’s sayings – need to be worked up and brought on).
I am not sure whether this last sentence represents de Salzmann’s aside, or was placed there by someone else. She made the point, which I feel the London notes bear out, that unedited, these notes incline towards being too dense. Thus, while I do not know if Madame ever gave approval of Mrs Staveley’s and Kherdian’s book prior to publication, it is that one which more closely accords with her advice:
As they are – Jane’s Notes – we would have to shorten them – edit them for reading. When they were given they were spoken – they were for that group to hear – for that moment – that meeting. They were spoken to be listened to. At a meeting – when spoken – the formulation does not matter so much because of the people there – they could be explained – elaborated – questions could be answered. But for reading by other people – people on their own – at home and not in meetings or groups – it would have to be different – and very carefully formulated – absolutely right.
One can sense the high demand which de Salzmann made, and the quality of thought which she brought (I am told she used to quote Gurdjieff as having said: “Very good is not good enough”). Other of de Salzmann’s comments, as recorded in these notes, illustrate the initial impulse which went into the production of this volume:
We must remember there is never enough MENACE in ourselves – never enough hard confrontation. If there is a true confrontation there is an agony – a horror – in that moment of balance. This way or that? Whichever way we go is an escape. We have to pay. If we give up then we are lost. … We meet someone – read a book – it arouses our interest – we feel that person has something. Even at a very early age that possibility of interest is there. This arousing of interest happens in our ordinary lives. We become aware that there is a hunger in us and because of that we follow that interest – we put our energy into that and no longer just as always before on everyday things. In doing that we put our energy onto a new and different level in ourselves.
We meet someone – like you met Jane – who has something different – that meeting raises your interest to this other level – it calls you to give your interest and energy in that direction. That person remains special for you – will always remain so – has become permanent. They have altered the direction of your life. Then later you will meet something else which will do the same and again raise you to another level. Gradually something becomes your own – what you have received is available to you. And you are in danger. There is a menace for you – a trap. You do not go on – you stay there. It has become too easy and you fall down and allow life to take you away. You do not stay there with that danger, that menace. You do not find your place. If you lose that position of danger it is hard to come back again.
Then there is TIME. Gurdjieff used to give work of a certain kind, for a time only. And just when people were getting used to that work – beginning to be able to do it – to find it easy, he would sweep it away – destroy it – because of that danger – the danger of it becoming too easy. Life changes – some of the things we still hear about – read about are now old fashioned. The time has gone for them, and this is inevitable and according to Law. There is a different way to call people to work now – a way that has to be used today. This we must always be searching for – and at the same time we must remain faithful to the Work – the Ideas – as we received them.
It is easy to make grand efforts – big efforts – to work extra hard on this or that, with terrific energy. This also can be an escape – can be a danger too. But if your work is related differently – if it is not just in one part – your mind or your feelings or your body – if everything in you is related and related to that danger – that menace – so that a true confrontation can take place – a confrontation that brings you up with a jerk – then that is different.
That, then, is how Jeanne de Salzmann came to be the godmother, as it were, of this volume. Now for the two other key players. Jane Heap and Annie-Lou Staveley were two of Gurdjieff’s most accomplished, and most faithful pupils. Unfortunately, there has not yet been any study of either of these most redoubtable persons which does them justice. Jane (1887-1964) was with Gurdjieff from about 1924, I believe, although at some point he sent her to London to commence her own groups. Initially, I understand, he asked her to join Ouspensky’s London group, but he refused to accept her. If I remember correctly, Moore says that his stated reason was that she was an ‘incorrigible lesbian’. Apart from wondering what a ‘corrigible lesbian’ would look like, and how Ouspensky would go about correcting one, I would need to see some evidence before I could believe that Ouspensky had made the comment: it seems an odd thing to say knowing that it could be reported, and that she had been a pupil of Gurdjieff’s.
The Contents
This book is direct and powerful to an extent I have never seen matched: “Only what we actually experience is valuable” [page 8]. As De Salzmann said, these notes tell how to apply the Gurdjieff method. They do not expound the ideas, but they operate from the ideas in such a way that certain important ones are highlighted; and when they are, their setting, which is a practical one, illuminates them in fresh ways. For example, she says that ‘I’ is a ‘power of emanation’ [12], and that it is a ‘potentiality of essence’ [13], and so opens a new perspective on these ideas. Then, the piece “I Am my Burden” draws on the Law of Seven, and yet develops it in a direction contemplated, but not executed, in Miraculous:
To finish everything you begin! We rarely finish anything completely – always something is lacking. How to see clearly in ourselves the cause of this! I may be unable to finish because I have decided but have not understood. … Or you may take the habit of finishing – but it will not give anything because the same habit may turn into something else. [3]
From these notes we can glimpse something of the teaching, and of the ‘technique of techniques’. I first heard this phrase from George Adie: both he and Helen Adie had been close to Jane, and they perhaps learned it from her. Mr Adie used it as a description of the Gurdjieff method, a technique which is not like any other we have known. It’s a technique which comes from a higher level, so that even in its form it is under fewer rules than our ordinary methods. The heart of this ‘technique of techniques’ is the preparation, and so, the preparation itself can also be called the ‘technique of techniques’. And yet, Jane says that “Every time I have to remind myself that it has to be the first time I ever tried the exercise” [16].
Can the use of a technique and the imperative to continually reinitiate fresh efforts be reconciled? They can be, and they often are, in practice. We see this even in the world where employing techniques in trades, arts and crafts, far from inhibiting freshness, makes it more possible. The great innovators like Leonardo da Vinci and J.S. Bach devoted great attention to the fine details of their arts. They can be reconciled in theory, too, because mastering the platform skills requires that the three platform functions (intellect, feeling and organic instinct) are trained, as a vine is trained to a trellis, and harmonized at least in respect of that art, which may explain why many people who master a craft, an art, a science or a skill, come to appreciate it with something in the direction of love.
The technique of techniques is under the laws of a higher world: it is based on the understanding of higher mind. In addition, the preparation is done in quiet, away from electro-magnetic fields, in the light and air of morning, which, as Gurdjieff said, possess special properties. Very few principles are required to do the preparation, either for the contemplative part, or to complete it by making a plan for the day or, in the evening, to review it and perhaps make a sketch for the following day.
Although the preparation is made in a special environment, with special knowledge, nonetheless its fruits must be expressed in this world: which means the formulation and the fixture of plan, and the wish and resolve to keep one’s word to oneself. So there is definition and decision, and it has to be that way. To refuse to use any technique is idiocy, a recipe for delusion. This is true whether we’re speaking of carpentry, gardening, painting, music, or inner development.
This point deserves emphasis: this book presents the authentic Gurdjieff teaching of the ‘preparation’ (not the ‘sitting’), thus Jane says “All depends on your preparation” [63] , but see also pp. 10 (mentioning divided attention), 14-16, 31, 34, 38, 46, 48-9, 52, 54, 63, 69 and 81. It helps that Jane refers both to the evening preparation and to the connection between the preparation and one’s plan for the day [pp. 14, 55 and 70]. The Adies brought all of these methods, and I have concluded that they are critical to any possibility of accelerated development. I would say that I proved this to myself, because after their deaths, I gradually let those good habits run down, but I’ve returned, thankfully, to them just in accordance with the principles they gave.
The preparation is a sort of bridge between worldly and spiritual life, what Mr Adie called ‘life under the sun’ and ‘life under the stars’. Both lives go together, as Jane said: “We transport into work what we are in life. If I behave like a pig in life, I behave in the work like a pig also …” [58]. Another practical concept uniting the two lives in practices is the teaching of the good householder, whom she says is “the man who neglects nothing. The man that is faithful and accurate in small things and, at the same time, remembers that he has another life to care for and who tries to relate them” [21, see also p. 15].
So, Jane points us to a unitive discipline [39], pursued for an aim [80]. To speak of discipline, today, invites resistance. Dr Lester often said that Jane understood the importance and lawfulness of resistance. He said, for example, that if someone in their craft shop The Rocking Horse was hammering an object which was not sufficiently steady, she would call out “Not enough denying force!”. The same wisdom inhabits this book: “The No is to make the Yes remembered. No and Yes have to become more inseparable – one without the other is not profitable. … Yes without No – the angel without the devil – is impotence. … If it were not so it would not lead you to something. It would be romance – fallacious.” [10-11]. Later, we find this powerful comment: “Gurdjieff says the word ‘passive’ meant something very strong and concrete” [66].
Negative emotions can be used: hence her succinct advice: “Look over the top of being negative” [26]. And not only negative emotions: Jane understood the value of fasting, [73], something which one can harmlessly experiment with by following the traditional fasts of the Eastern Christian Churches (modern Catholic practice is arguably better than nothing, but it does not compare to the Eastern traditions).
A special feature of this volume is that Jane preserves in an organic context many sayings of Gurdjieff, some of which would otherwise have been lost. Here is my list:
“Try to be responsible for what you have understood” [19]
“We are always making requirements” [24]
“To believe is to make sheep” [36]
“Revalue your values” [40]
“Everyone has a dog in himself” [41]
“Not even an apparatus in us for negative emotions – but they use every part of us”[42]
“Your work is cheap” [44]
“You are a very naive person” [46]
“A good egoist is something very big – a man who becomes concerned for his own reality, then begins to be concerned for the reality of others” [50]
“Try to do what you do – just what you do – but do it!” [58]
“Use little reminding factors” [59]
At the end of the volume, as noted, are her powerful aphorisms. An earlier draft of this review cited some, but there were so many I ached to include that it became unworkable. So I have, instead, selected lines from the other part of the text which strike me as profound with an almost unearthly profundity: “A picture formation in the mind is one of the foods for attention. Think what is meant by this food – food for voluntary attention” [53]; “What you have lived in dreams is etched in you …” [26], and with that, “As long as you accept to feed on deception you will not be given better food” [17].
There are so many such master-teachings that I cannot do them justice. I will give a subjective list of a few: see [44] for her comments on blood and instinct, [45] on worry, [76] on death, and pp. 19, 22-23, 28-29, 32-33, 50, 69, 71 and 76-77 for her comments on reality, unity aim and cause and control. It seems to me that she gives the clue to a theoretical understanding of reality and unreality in oneself. One of Jane’s famous sayings about death is here, too [76]. Dr Lester was there when a woman, in a state of mild anxiety, asked Jane what death was like. Jane replied: “Don’t worry. You won’t notice much difference.”
Finally, the Notes of Jane Heap ends with a few extracts about death and recurrence. And that is a good way to end. But this volume ends with something I think is even better: a chapter titled ‘Here – Now’ which seems to me to sum up the entire book in a tour de force. I will end with just one sentence from that chapter:
Do not fear – it is stupid. Quieten your emotions – this is the first step – then collect a little.

Gopi Krishna's Kundalini Experience

LIVING WITH KUNDALINI It is a grave error to suppose that the arousal of kundalini can be achieved with impunity by anyone who applies himself to the discipline. The popular idea that the practices result simply in the activation of a new force in the body is fallacious. Those who believe that the arousal and mastery of the force can be achieved by one's willful effort alone live in a paradise of fools. Properly speaking, the position has to be viewed the other way round. It is actually the pressure exerted by the slowly opening supersensory channel in the brain on one's mind which acts as the root of the religious impulse, driving one to seek expedients to satisfy the longing.
It is not a little more calmness or relaxed condition of the mind nor a little more creative ability nor a feeling of euphoria nor visionary experiences nor a little more efficiency in work that determines whether or not a transformation in consciousness has occurred in an individual. Rather, it is a complete metamorphosis of the personality that points to it.
The craziness of religious mania is similar to the eccentricity and madness of genius. Only the aberration takes a different form. It is only the highest luminaries, comparatively speaking, who have been free from it. Excessive penance, horrible self-mortification, utter seclusion, denial of love, renunciation of the world and family, abnormal ways of life and behavior, quaint appearance and dress are all part of this mania.
Unless the mind has been disciplined from an early age, a stimulated kundalini brings with it an irrepressible desire for the occult and the bizarre. It is incredible to what extent the victims of this desire can be duped by pseudo-Godmen, charlatans and impostors...In my own lifetime, one of these Godmen, residing in a village in Kashmir, used to urinate into a silver vessel in full view of the crowds that came to visit him and then sprinkled the liquid over the audience, both men and women. It is even said that his admirers held up their faces and uncovered their bosoms to receive the sanctifying drops.
The need for a highly balanced and regulated life, as a prerequisite for cosmic consciousness, was recognized in India from very early days. The emphasis of all great religions on a chaste, consecrated life stems from the same necessity.
The awakening may be gradual or sudden, varying in intensity and effect according to the development, constitution, and temperament of different individuals; but in most cases it results in a greater instability of the emotional nature and a greater liability to aberrant mental conditions in the subject, mainly resulting from tainted heredity, faulty modes of conduct, or immoderation in any shape or form.
It seemed as if I had abruptly precipitated myself from the steady rock of normality into a madly racing whirlpool of abnormal existence. The keen desire to sit and meditate, which had always been present during the preceding days, disappeared suddenly and was replaced by a feeling of horror of the supernatural. I wanted to fly from even the thought of it. At the same time I felt a sudden distaste for work and conversation, with the inevitable result that being left with nothing to keep myself engaged, time hung heavily on me, adding to the already distraught condition of my mind.
The nights were even more terrible. I could not bear to have a light in my room after I had retired to bed. The moment my head touched the pillow a large tongue of flame sped across the spine into the interior of my head. It appeared as if the stream of living light continuously rushing through the spinal cord into the cranium gathered greater speed and volume during the hours of darkness. Whenever I closed my eyes I found myself looking into a weird circle of light, in which luminous currents swirled and eddied, moving rapidly from side to side. The spectacle was fascinating but awful, invested with a supernatural awe which sometimes chilled the very marrow in my bones.
I seemed to have touched accidentally the lever of an unknown mechanism, hidden in the extremely intricate and yet unexplored nervous structure in the body, releasing a hitherto pent-up torrent which, impinging upon the auditory and optic regions, created the sensation of roaring sounds and weirdly moving lights, introducing an entirely new and unexpected feature into the normal working of the mind that gave to all my thoughts and actions the semblance of unreality and abnormality.
For weeks I had no respite. Each morning heralded for me a new kind of terror, a fresh complication in the already disordered system, a deeper fit of melancholy or more irritable condition of the mind which I had to restrain, to prevent it from completely overwhelming me, by keeping myself alert, usually after a completely sleepless night; and after withstanding patiently the tortures of the day, I had to prepare myself for even worse torment of the night.
A man cheerfully overcomes insurmountable difficulties and bravely faces overwhelming odds when he is confident of his mental and physical condition. I completely lost confidence in my own mind and body and lived like a haunted, terror-stricken stranger in my own flesh, constantly reminded of my precarious state. My consciousness was in such a state of unceasing flux that I was never certain how it would behave within the next few minutes. It rose and fell like a wave, raising me one moment out of the clutches of fear to dash me again the next into the depths of despair.
It seemed as if the stream of vitality rising into my brain through the spinal cord, connected mysteriously with the region near the base of the spine, was playing strange tricks with my imagination. Also I was unable to stop it or to resist its effect on my thoughts. Was I losing my mind? Were these the first indications of mental disorder? This thought constantly drove me to desperation. It was not so much the extremely weird nature of my mental condition as the fear of incipient madness or some grave disorder of the nervous system which filled me with growing dismay.
No one could even suspect what was happening to me inside. I knew that but a thin line now separated me from lunacy, and yet I gave no indication of my condition to anyone. I suffered unbearable torture in silence, weeping internally at the sad turn of events, blaming myself bitterly again and again for having delved into the supernatural without first acquiring a fuller knowledge of the subject and providing against the dangers and risks of the path.
I did not know then what I came to grasp later on--that an automatic mechanism, forced by the practice of meditation, had suddenly started to function with the object of reshaping my mind to make it fit for the expression of a more heightened and extended consciousness by means of biological processes as natural and as governed by inviolable laws as the evolution of species or the development and birth of a child.
Whenever my mind turned upon itself I always found myself staring with growing panic into the unearthly radiance that filled my head, swirling and eddying like a fearsome whirlpool; I even found its reflection in the pitch darkness of my room during the slowly dragging hours of the night. Not infrequently it assumed horrible shapes and postures, as if satanic faces were grinning and inhuman forms gesticulating at me in the darkness.
...There was a sound like a nerve thread snapping and instantaneously a silvery streak passed zigzag through the spinal cord, exactly like the sinuous movement of a white serpent in rapid flight, pouring an effulgent, cascading shower of brilliant vital energy into my brain, filling my head with a blissful luster in place of the flame that had been tormenting me for the last three hours. Completely taken by surprise at this sudden transformation of the fiery current darting across the entire network of my nerves only a moment before, and overjoyed at the cessation of pain, I remained absolutely quiet and motionless for some time, tasting the bliss of relief with a mind flooded with emotion, unable to believe I was really free of the horror. Tortured and exhausted almost to the point of collapse by the agony I had suffered during the terrible interval, I immediately fell asleep, bathed in light, and for the first time after weeks of anguish felt the sweet embrace of restful sleep.
In the case of a sudden, powerful arousal of the Serpent Power, the utmost care has to be taken of the following: (1) the state of mind, (2) the intake of food, and (3) erotic behavior. The will must have been already cultivated to exercise control over the now chaotic state of the mind. Like the pendulum of a clock, it oscillates between hope and fear, anxiety and assurance, joy and sorrow, for no apparent reason, as if pushed from this side to that and back again by an invisible force from within in a manner entirely unpredictable to the subject of the experience. If the will is not firm and lacks the strength to hold itself in check, the oscillations can lead to those irresponsible acts which are a characteristic of mental disorder.
There was no diminution in the vital radiation which, emanating from the seat of kundalini, sped across my nerves to every part of the body, filling my ears with strange sounds and my head with strange lights, but the current was now warm and pleasing instead of hot and burning, and it soothed and refreshed the tortured cells and tissues in a truly miraculous manner.
I was in an extraordinary state: a lustrous medium, intensely alive and acutely sentient, shining day and night, permeated my whole system, racing through every part of my body, perfectly at home and absolutely sure of its path. I often watched the marvelous play of this radiant force in utter bewilderment.
What made me hesitate in according publicity to it is the unique nature of the phenomenon; it neither falls in line with the known manifestations observed in mediums, nor does it seem similar in kind to the recorded experience of any known mystic or saint, Eastern or Western. Its peculiarity lies in the fact that, in its entire character, the phenomenon represents the attempt of a hitherto unrecognized vital force in the human body, releasable by voluntary efforts, to mold the available psychophysiological apparatus of an individual to such a condition as to make it responsive to states of consciousness not normally perceptible before.
I was now a spectator of a weird drama enacted in my own body in which an immensely active and powerful vital force, released all of a sudden by the power of meditation, was incessantly at work and, after having taken control of all the organs and the brain, was hammering and pounding them into a certain shape. I merely observed the weird performance, the lightning-like movements of the lustrous intelligent power commanding absolute knowledge of and dominance over the body.
I do not know how it happened that, even in that extremely abnormal state of my mind, needing constantly the application of new measures to adapt it to changing circumstances, I often hit upon the right procedure to deal with unexpected and difficult situations arising in my day-to-day contacts. If I had even so much as hinted to colleagues a word about my abnormality and the bizarre manifestations which were now a regular feature of my life, I might have been labeled a lunatic and treated accordingly.
To the frivolous inquiries directed to gathering more information about my experience, I usually turned a deaf ear, maintaining a reserve which has continued to this day. Failing to gain satisfaction for their curiosity and finding no remarkable change in me, the story of my spiritual adventure was treated as a myth, and to some I even became an object of ridicule for having mistaken a physical ailment for a divine dispensation.
From a unit of consciousness, dominated by the ego, to which I was habituated from childhood, I had expanded all at once into a glowing conscious circle, growing larger and larger, until a maximum was reached, the "I" remaining as it was, but instead of a confining unit, now itself encompassed by a shining conscious globe of vast dimensions...Speaking more precisely, there was ego consciousness as well as a vastly extended field of awareness, existing side by side, both distinct yet one.
An ordinary man in a humble walk of life, burdened with responsibilities, as I always have been and think myself to be, I never allowed any false idea about myself to take root in my mind after the new development. On the other hand, my absolute helplessness before the lately manifest power in me had the effect of humbling what little remnant of pride I still possessed.